Thanksgiving is great if you love football, lethargy, and eating seven different kinds of stuffing in under twenty minutes. However, some family dinner conversation can lead to a very tense dessert. In the wake of an election that drastically divided the country, it’s safe to say that some political talk is inevitably on the menu this holiday. But I’ll tell you a little secret: it doesn’t have to be!
We’ve prepared a list of ten hot baseball topics to help you keep your family both distracted and informed, because no one wants to see a casserole dish of candied yams get flung through a window...do people still eat those?
1. THE CUBS WON A WORLD SERIES TITLE AND THIS ISN’T A LOW BUDGET SCI-FI MOVIE
The entire road to the World Series title was a whirlwind, Cubs fan or not. It’s everything we’ve been craving out of baseball for the past decade and now that we have it make sure no one forgets. Winning over 100 regular season games, Jake Arrieta being his own run support, coming back from a 3-1 deficit, you can keep your family enraptured until next Thanksgiving. Goat props are optional but encouraged.
2. A.J. Preller and forging of players’ medical documents
Ah yes, Padre-gate. It seems the Padres GM has gotten off with a slap on the wrist for lying to teams about the physical conditions of players he was dealing them. Has this changed the climate of the trade deadline for worse? What other punishments should Preller face, if any? Just be careful with this one, because it does leave a peephole for a, “You know who else has a huge scandal?” conversation.
3. Is the Designated Hitter spot archaic
With the birth of the #PitchersWhoRake movement, should the American League lose the player position that differentiates them from the National League? Or does the DH spot give the game a little extra pizzazz? Better question: Has Madison Bumgarner ruined everyone’s fun?
4. David Ortiz retiring
Big Papi had a grandiose, if not a little controversial, career in baseball. Regardless of your team affiliation, the Boston legend was fun to watch...even if you only realized it was fun until after the game was over and your frustration subsided. Get your family talking about the Ortiz moments that stand out to them to most and what they think about his farewell tour. Bonus if you family is full of Yankees fans and now have a better place to direct their hatred.
5. Let’s legalize steroids in baseball because that would just solve all of the problems (or would it?)
Yes, no, maybe so? There is no right answer to this topic, only strong opinions. With some regulations could the introduction of legal Human Growth Hormone be the future of professional baseball? Or does that only cheapen the game?
6. What cities should MLB look to expand in?
The NFL just played a game in Mexico, I think baseball can at least think of putting a major league team in North Carolina. What about another team up in Canada? Actually, on second thought...don’t mention Canada.
7. Should MLB teams handle closers with care?
Cue my father yelling about how Goose Gossage was made of steel and “closers these days are too soft” and coddled. The point is valid though. Are teams going the extra mile to protect their closers only hurting the pitchers in the long run? See what your famsquad thinks. This also provides a great springboard to hear about any cherished baseball memories members of your family may have. Keep cherishing them.
8. The Cubs won their first World Series IN 108 YEARS EVERYONE THIS IS BIG
If things really get ugly, do not stop talking about the Cubs. Just keep repeating the rosters from the past century if you have to. Talk about Cleveland blowing a 3-1 lead. List things that move slower than Aroldis Chapman’s fastball. Make your family stare into Kris Bryant’s eyes to lull them into complacency. That should do it.
9. Mike Trout: big fish in a little pond
Mike Trout has deserved every MVP award he’s won, but doesn’t deserve the suffering of being on a team that’s consistently failing to perform. Can he still make a difference in Los Angeles or is it time to take his talents elsewhere? I apologize if your family excommunicates you over my bad pun.
10. Should MLB further eliminate the human element from baseball?
Umps cause a lot of issues when it comes to consistently calling the right zones. They’re only human, and it’s hard to be so on par when they can see an upwards of 200 pitches in a game. With that being said, is it time to make a more accurate game with the introduction of lasers to measure if pitch was a ball or a strike? I see we’re back in that low budget sci-fi movie once again.
What planet is Andrew Miller from?
I have my money on Saturn, to be honest.
Every stadium needs to have a “take your dog to a game” day
I don’t know why this isn’t a law yet. So. Many. Good. Dogs.